Rant: Objectivity, IR, human rights..

WARNING: This rant is a very emotional & jumbled up expression of my current thoughts and feelings.

Sometimes i find it incredibly hard to watch the news. Whenever i hear or learn about injustices taking place in the world something inside of me starts to burn. I am generally a very positive and optimistic person, and i always will be, but the more i hear about things such as sex trafficking, war, AIDS, human right violations and  other abuses my inside seems to fire up and i get very very angry. The funny thing is  my major and minor (International Relations and Peace Studies) require me to constantly read, learn and hear about various social, political and economic problems as well as general abuses to the human race. You would think that i would be used to hearing about these things but im not. Not at all.

Its funny because i think that at times my anger, passion or deep emotion is looked down upon. For example, i remember writing a research paper on injustices in Iran and I was criticized by a professor because my personal feelings were being expressed a little and this was wrong because most academic papers have to be objective. I have a big problem with this. Why must i hide my feelings and emotions when writing about something i care deeply about?  When writing about a social or political issue shouldnt one be personaly invested and care about what it is they are writing? Shouldnt politicians and anyone working in policy or international relations be passionate about what they believe in and have that inspire and motivate the work they do? Why is it wrong for work to be motivated by love & compassion that we have for people? I am told constantly, especially in my IR classes that this perspective is idealistic and naive. People are selfish and thats the way they always will be. The political structure is a terrible one but be "realistic" Ayma, thats just how it is. But WHY? If we all believe that the system is flawed then how can we just accept it? Why would we just accept it? Because it is easy? Because it is too hard to believe that maybe it can be improved and we can work towards a world that is more loving, more united and more peaceful? Are we too lazy to work towards a structure that is fruitful, productive and is protective of human dignity and life?

I am so thankful that i will never be convinced that people dont have the capacity to love and work towards bettering the world. I owe it all to my parents, who raised me to FIRMLY believe that there is good in everyone and that we should always be working towards the betterment of mankind.

"It is not for him to pride himself who loveth his own country, but rather for him who loveth the whole world. The earth is but one country, and mankind its citizens." -Baha'u'llah

On-the-go meal.

I used to have a food blog

aka, i love good food.

And talking about food.

Here is a typical on-the-go meal from my dining hall

 protein: tofu

 veggies: tomatoes, broccoli, water chestnuts (? not sure if thats the right word)

 carbs: potato wedges

all dressed in salt, pepper and vinegar

nom. nom. nom.

Zumba face.

This is my sweaty zumba face:

ZUMBA= most intense + fun work out ever.

My heart rate was up for an entire hour and i couldn't stop laughing.

SO MUCH FUN.

Happy tip.

Heres a tip:

If you are ever sad or angry, FORCE yourself to smile.

You will feel like an idiot and start laughing at yourself.

It never fails.

DO IT.

Word.

During my study abroad in Uganda and Rwanda i picked up alot of new words in Kinyarwanda, Acholi, Luganda & even some french words! Unfortunately i have forgotten most of them, so i decided to make a list of the ones i do remember so that i never forget them:

WARNING : my spelling is very very off.

Kinyarwanda:

-muraho (hello)

-muracoze (thank you)

-tuzongera (bye)

-avoka (avocado)

-kugura (buy)

-amazi (water)

-amakuru? (how are you?)

-nimeza (i am well)

Luganda:

-banange (OMG!/ thats crazy)

Acholi:

-kuce (peace)

French:

jeswe segus (i am happy)

fegme la pomp (close the pump)

ovgeeg la pomp (open the pump)

tabl (table)

fromage (cheese)

and then of course there is one word i will probably never forget: Mzungu (white person).

Almost everywhere i went many people would point at me and yell  "mzungu, mzungu!"

Thats all i remember for now, i will add to this list whenever another word comes to me!

Photo.

I have wanted to take a photography class for so long, unfortunately i wasn't sure about signing up because the class would require alot more money than usual.

I finally decided, after my friend told me i could borrow her camera, that for my last semester at school i would sign up for the class!

Best decision ever.

 I honestly knew know nothing about photography, but im starting to LOVE it.

It takes so much longer than i thought to develop film and make prints, but its SO gratifying when you see the finished process.

 My first developed film and contact sheets.

First print for our "object" assignment

Wedding dress

Yes.

 I am a huge dork & have already picked out my future wedding dress, color scheme & decor. 

Since I'm being honest I might as well also admit that I have picked out names for my future children as well. 

These very pressing issues have been on my mind probably since the age of 7.

So, without any further ado-

 here is the dress I will hopefully be wearing on my wedding day:

I do think I would like to change the material of the sleeves to make it look a wee bit simpler though!

1st day of spring.

Happy Naw Ruz and first day of spring!

I am excited and ready for this new chapter in life.

Naw Ruz eve.

Happy Naw Ruz eve from the Rouhani sibbies!

Starbie party.

There aint no partay like a starbie partay!

Sometimes.

Sometimes i think should run away to L.A and go be the voice of a disney cartoon.

OR

 I could open up a local coffee/ tea/ cupcake shop with cool decor that plays live music every other night & showcases local art. 

OR

i could head to NYC and fulfill my childhood dream of being a broadway actress.

'

OR 

I could travel. 

Go to every single country in the world. 

And then write a book about tea around the world & how it brings people together.

There is SO much I want to do and so little time!

Sleepy Tigers.

My song of the week.

Oh I like you so very much so much in fact I gotta wake you up

It’s not that I have words to speak

I just wanna see you looking at me

In a way, that states

In an hour when the sun comes up

We’re gonna put on our shoes we’re gonna shake the dust

Open the door with your brand new key

We won’t be afraid of being sweet

to ourselves

Or anybody! anybody else!

Oh I miss you so very much so much in fact i gotta call you up

It’s not that I have news to bring

I just wanna make your telephone ring

So it shows and you know

In a week when I fly back home

We’re gonna jump in bed and be all alone

you’ll make biscuits and I’ll make tea

We’ll curl up close and then fall asleep

To the sound… of no one else no else around

And if Ive learned anything at all

In this short life of mine (it’s this)…

If you hear that joy has come to town

Track it down, take a picture and tape it to your eyes

Oh I love you so very much so much in fact I'm gonna switch it up

I'm gonna take this room that I built for fun

And burn down the walls in front of everyone

So they see, you and me

Dancing in our sleepy clothes

With two big smiles and a bowl of hope!

That we’ll drink down like ginger tea

The heat will help us forget everything

That you and I, that you and I have seen

And if Ive learned anything at all

In this short life of mine (it’s this)…

If you hear that joy has come to town

Track it down, take a picture and tape it to your eyes

Smudge.

My bff just bought a new bunny.

Her official name is Smudge, but everyone calls her Monkey.

Pepp and limas.

I am a master at putting together unusual dishes when ingredients are limited. 

Last night i couldnt find anything in the fridge so i ended up making a snack with

- cooked lima beans (from a bag in the freezer)

- a chopped up yellow pepper

- olive oil, salt and peppa

all mixed together.

Simple, healthy and yum.

nom nom nom.

Rant: "I cant"

I don't believe in "I cant." Never have, never will. I also don't believe in "sorry I've been busy."

Now I know there are obviously exceptions and times you really cant do something, but for the most part, i find these statements are usually just excuses.  To yourself and to me.

Now i must admit that i myself even say "i cant" often , but when i do i know im lying to myself. Truth is, I know deep down that if i wanted something bad enough, i would do whatever i needed to do it. It may be very very very very hard but it IS possible. 

If you want something, really want something, then you are never too busy for whatever it is you want to do. You can MAKE time. Prioritize. Spend less time doing other things to make room for something that is important to you.

Im not entirely sure what the point of this rant is. I guess what I mean to say is that if you tell me you cant do something, chances are i probably wont believe you. What i will think is that you don't care enough to make the effort.

I guess this might come across harsh, but its only because i truly believe you can do ANYTHING.

And when you tell me you "cant" i will take it as you don't want to because you don't care enough. 

If you truly care about something or someone you do whatever you can to make them happy, or be with them, or achieve whatever goal you truly desire.

Arab loving.

Love this video. 

I seriously miss the Arab world.

Growing up in Dubai Arab culture was a big part of my life.

Also, my mom was born and raised in Kuwait and this has caused my brother and I to truly appreciate and love for Arabic food, music, dancing, storytelling, hospitality....

Take me back to Dubai!

I need some waraq 3enab!

Banana leaves.

This one of my favorite things i brought back from Rwanda.

It is all made out of banana leaves!

I love how beautifully delicate it is.

Pony

New hurr in a ponytail

Roomie.

My humble abode.

Hurrcut

hurrcutt? CHECK!

Starbie love.

Im slightly embarrassed to admit that i am an avid Starbucks goer. 

I blame the Rouhani's.

Ever since I was younger my parents, aunt and uncles, and even my grandparents, would ALWAYS head to Starbucks for their daily/every other day caffeine fix. 

No other coffee place would do, it had to be Starbucks.

I even remember jumping out of the car to get a drink for my aunt and being amazed at how complicated her order was, "extra hot skim double shot latte please."

I now have to own up to the fact that I have adopted the immense Starbie addiction love myself.

I cant help it! 

A grande skim latte w/ only one shot of expresso & cinnamon sprinkled on top somehow seems to make my day slightly sweeter.

Luckily, Starbie is not a daily habit for me. 

 Just a once or twice a week pick me up.

Anyways, today I got a Starbucks card! Something I should have done a while ago!

Bring on the free refills, birthday drink and other freebies.

Might as well!

New beginnings.

I love a fresh start.

A new beginning.

Another chance.

A new chapter.

March 21st is the first day of spring and the Baha'i & Iranian new year.

 Its a time of celebration, love, family, &, in our household, presents! 

I am going to take advantage of Naw Ruz, or in English- "New Day," by making it the start of a new happier chapter of my life.

 My fresh start will be made up of small & big changes that will hopefully make things a little more exciting, fresh and new. Change always does a person some good!

Things I plan to do:

1. Get a haircut

2. Continue having a positive & healthy outlook when it comes to my body. 

3. Keep up my goal to exercise 3-4 days a week. GO RUNNING outside in good weather. 

4. Be more patient and supportive of everyone close to me. Family and friends.

5. Put aside more time each day to pray & meditate.

6. Spend money more carefully. Invest in things that are good quality and long lasting rather than buying a number of cheaper items.

7. Be more organized and check off tasks in my google calender in a timely, less stressed out manner. 

8. Finally sell all the books I have accumulated for school the past 2 years.

9. Stop being so critical & hard on myself. I am not in a rush to grow up.

10. Slow down & live in the moment.

My favourite prayer

"O God! Refresh and gladden my spirit. Purify my heart. Illumine my powers. I lay all my affairs in Thy hand. Thou art my Guide and my Refuge. I will no longer be sorrowful and grieved; I will be a happy and joyful being. O God! I will no longer be full of anxiety, nor will I let trouble harass me. I will not dwell on the unpleasant things of life. O God! Thou art more friend to me than I am to myself. I dedicate myself to Thee, O Lord."

Whenever I am feeling down, hopeless or frustrated, saying this prayer always manages to put me at ease & uplift my soul. 

All I want right now

All I want right now is to be able to lounge around outside on the grass with my gold sparkly Toms on my feet and the sun beating down on my skin

Baby I was born this way

why i have the best roomate

Why J is the best roomie/ biffle....

Kittens n mittens

When I was a wee lad my parents had alot of trouble getting me to give up using my baby bottles. Eventually they my dad came up with the idea of telling me that the mama cat in our neighborhood had baby kittens and that she couldnt afford to buy them all baby bottles for milk. My parents told me that they had given away all my baby bottles to the mama cat so that the kittens could have full & happy tummys. They also said that the mama cat had thanked me personally for the baby bottles. Thinking that a bunch of baby kittens were using my bottles stopped me from being angry and upset.... and thus i graduated on to using big girl cups!

image from here

Lake runs

So lately I have been making the most of our semi-sunny days by running around the lake by my house. It feels so good to run on something other than a treadmill, and to breathe in the air outside. I love living within walking distance to a lake. And I cant wait for all the trees, plants and flowers to grow bright and bloomy in the spring!

Robeks

When i was in Arizona this winter my cuz introduced me to fresh carrot and apple juice at Robeks. At first I was hesitant to try it but im so glad i did. It was delish and such a good energy booster! I wish we had a Robeks close by! I could really go for a juice right now!

summer days

I also miss

summer day trips to D.C with good people.

I miss you summer.

I miss you summer.